Pirates of the Carribean: Return of a Lord
by James Greenbrier
Summary: Jack and Teague go for the Fountain of youth, and then their adventures continue as circumstances allow. Please review. Chap 7 is up.
1. Chapter 1: Getting a Ship

Disclaimer: I don't own any of this.

**Chapter 1**

Captain Teague Sparrow was sitting on the stool the owner of this decrepit inn had shown him. Around him were people of all sorts, some beggars, some rich, and some in between. He was trying to win a ship for him and his son to use to find the most coveted Pirate treasure of them all, the fountain of youth. Many had spent their whole lives searching for it, culminating in the ultimate irony, living forever, or die trying.

His current for of gambling was a game he had learned back in his days in the Philippines, a game which included dice, where the various players rolled six dice and would bet on whoever has the highest roll. The trick was that the dice were under cups with which the dice would be hidden.

His situation was promising, for he had five sixes and a two. The person sitting across from him, Captain William J. Garfunkel, was heavily in dept, and heavily under the influence of the gallon of rum he had just consumed. The intoxicated Captain also happened to be the owner of a forty gun vessel that was known in the Philippines for its speed and versatility.

"I bet seventy five pounds" Teague offered, once everybody had signaled that they were ready to begin.

"Call," said a one Mr. Jack Derip Er, a pirate known for killing anyone who had the gall to boast at his last name.

"Call," agreed Captain Frank UnCourson Kilbourn, who hailed from a very vulgar country in Asia known for the strangeness of their middle names.

"Fold," replied Mr. Imp Way

"Raise to forty thousand, which my ship should suffice," said Captain Garfunkel, writing the name of his ship on a piece of parchment and placing it on the table.

"Call" said a smiling Captain Teague, as others around the table folded.

"Very well, show me your hand," replied an uncertain Garfunkel.

"Four sixes and a two: Twenty-six," an overconfident Teague said.

"Fine, my ship is docked in the bay, you can't miss it. I'll tell my crew to surrender it to you, so that you may take it over," explained Captain Garfunkel, a tear forming in his eye, "But just one thing."

"Yes?" asked a curious Captain Teague, his hand on his pistol.

"Any last words?" Garfunkel pointed his gun at Teague, but Teague was quicker. Garfunkel was dead before he pulled the trigger.

……

_I can't seem to keep a hold of one bloody ship, _thought Jack Sparrow, as he was waiting for his father to come out of the pub that he had been in for the last four hours. _Maybe it's just the _Pearl_. Of course, it is my fault for ever leaving Barbossa on my ship. Maybe if I just…_ But Jack's thoughts were interrupted as a huge mob of people with guns came out of the pub, chasing Jack's father, Teague, out of the building.

"What in the bloody hell is going on?" asked Jack, joining his father on the run.

"Accidentally shot the governor here."

"How can you accidentally shoot a governor?" Jack asked, taking a turn at the corner.

"You accidentally shot a Count"

"Yes, well you accidentally shot mum!"

"Trust me, Jacky. That wasn't an accident."

They finally lost the crowd, and started walking through the empty streets. "Any luck with finding me a ship?" Jack asked, wanting to know if this whole thing had been in vain.

"Yes, that's what that was all about."

"Well, show the way, then."

But they were already there. And just out of luck, so was Mr. Gibbs.

"Cap'n, yer father had me run up ahead."

"Good thinking Mr. Gibbs," said Jack, not getting the point as usual, "Now we sail to Tortuga!"

"But Cap'n, what if someone should challenge us?"

Captain Teague answered this one. "No Sailor can attack the keeper of the code."


	2. Chapter 2: Getting a Crew

Disclaimer: I don't own any of this.

**Chapter 2**

When the trio finally arrived in Tortuga after three weeks of sailing, they found an old friend, Darryl Smythe, who was unconscious and smelled of rum on the dock where they arrived. Smythe was an old family friend, as his father was the first mate of Captain Teague on his first ship, and Darryl himself had been on the ship of Jack's first voyage. When Jack disembarked, he poured a bottle of water on the drunk's head, and offered the awakening form a hand.

"Jack?"

"It's Captain Jack, mate." Jack said, taking back his hand.

"Who lost a bet?"

"Governor of Florida, actually." Jack said, warranting an astonished look from Darryl.

"I heard he got shot."

"That was me dad."

"Teague's here?" asked Darryl, suddenly afraid, "why? Is it me? Did I do something? I've always kept to the code!"

"No, no mate. We're here for a crew."

"Oh," Darryl said, getting to his feet, "I can help you out with that. I know everyone around here." Just as he said this, a man in a suit, under the shreds of a dress, walked up to them.

"Are you Captain Jack Sparrow?" the man asked.

"That depends. Who's asking?"

"I am Warwick Furold Gerto Ceilice Brian James Frank Evergreen III, at your service, sir."

"Do you have a shorter name?"

"Yes, sir," The decrepit former transvestite answered, "You may call me Jim."

Jack would've said more, but Teague disembarked from the ship at that moment, Gibbs close behind. Introductions were exchanged, and the new group of five pirates split up into various taverns to recruit a crew of one hundred and forty men in a town with a population of ninety.

…………

Jack went to the Black Beard tavern, where, he walked up the bar, asked for a bottle of rum, and promptly asked the person sitting next to him to join the crew. The person just happened to have been the first mate of a ship that had sank three nights earlier, and had a crew under his command. The man's name was William Kidd, only 17 years old.

…………

Mr. Gibbs stayed with Teague, and watched as Teague took out his pirate codex, and announced that he was looking for volunteers to sail with the Keeper of the Code of the Brethren. By the end of the day, Teague and Jack had found enough people to take over a ship which required a somewhat smaller crew, and once again set sail. Not knowing the original name of the ship, Jack broke a bottle of champagne that he had stolen in Tortuga on it, and christened it the _Jack's Rum_.

Meanwhile, Teague and Mr. Gibbs were consulting the cut out of the map that Jack had stolen from Barbossa.

"Are you certain that this leads to the fountain of youth?" Gibbs asked, taking a slug of rum, "I heard it was in Florida. According to this, it's in Scotland."

"Trust me, Mr. Gibbs," Teague said, grabbing the rum, "That doesn't say Scotland."

"But it says the land of the Scotch."

"Aye, but you're not thinking like a true pirate." Teague said, taking out a bottle, "Scotch Island is a place that I used to drop by, back when I was Captain of the _Dreary Star_, there was a distillery, which ironically, made everything that has alcohol in it but Scotch. Back then, pirates would stop by the island when their crews were out of rum."

"Aye, I heard of such a place," Gibbs said, "But I heard tell that the island was once part of Spain, but then the king banished it from the island because it made wine flow through the streets. With the help of the Pope, I heard that he actually managed to get it to float through the ocean, and it is never in the same place twice."

"You know your stories," Teague congratulated him, "But it wasn't the wine flow that got the island made an island. The owners of the land were hiding me, and it was around the time of one of the callings of the Court of the Brethren."

"So how do you get there?" Gibbs asked.

"By soaking the sails with rum," Jack said, joining them.

"But there isn't enough rum on the ship," said Captain Teague.

"So what do we do?" asked the young Mr. Kidd, joining the conversation.

"We find the thing that we need to find it."


	3. Chapter 3: Getting a Drink

Disclaimer: I don't own any of this.

**Chapter 3**

So now our heroes are off. Teague knows something that Jack doesn't, and Jack doesn't like it. They are off to find something that Jack doesn't know what it is. Teague, in fact, is the only one who knows what it is. So that's the way things are.

…………

"Can you please tell me," Jack asked, for the umpteenth time and adding, "Pa?"

"No," Teague answered, "if you ask me one more time, I'll blow your bloody head off."

It had been this way for the past eight days of sailing, Jack either asking himself, or having other people in the crew ask his dreaded father.

"At least tell me why all of the rum's gone," Jack asked resenting this pattern of a lack of his favorite companion.

"No."

Jack turned away from his father, walking down to talk to Darryl Smythe, as Mr. Gibbs walked up to the senior Sparrow.

"Captain, the men are restless. They can't do their work while they're sober. It's been twelve days without rum!"

"Aye, Mr. Gibbs," said Teague, "after twelve days without rum, on the twelfth day, at the eighteenth hour, with nineteen minutes and forty-five seconds, a small ship will come out of the water. On that ship is a man, a man by many names, who will have a map. But he will only give the map to a pirate who has never broken the pirate code."

"Are you talking about Uncle Grant?" Jack asked, having now joined the conversation.

"Uncle?" Gibbs asked, "Would that make him your brother?"

"Aye, me brother," Teague answered, "He and I were raised by our father, Bartholomew Sparrow, who was one of the writers of the code. Dexter was me little brother, and when pa died, I gave up my post as Pirate lord of Madagascar to become keeper of the code. My dear brother inherited me dad's old loot, bought a big chunk of Spain, and created a place divided into various sections, each with giant rivers of various 'liquors and other alcoholic beverages', as he would say. Anyway, after he created the fountain of youth, which he built a giant fortress around which was impenetrable, save for an entrance which was guarded by a sphinx."

"A sphinx?" Jack asked

"A sphinx," Teague confirmed, "Anyway, he only made it through once, as he was never one for riddles. He got just enough potion for the both of us, six cups' worth, before being kicked off of his own land. Now he is cursed until two of his blood joins him to reclaim his land."

"If you already have drunk from the fountain of youth, then why are you here?" asked Darryl Smythe, who had just joined them.

"One cup of the fountain of youth only adds thirty three years of life to your normal lifespan, and I had three when I was twenty five. That was One hundred and thirty years ago. I've gotten fond of living."

…………

It was six O'clock. Quarter past, actually. Four more minutes. The last time Teague had seen his brother, he'd shot him, forgetting that he was immortal. Jack had been just six years old then.

"Sir, there is a ship off port!" Mr. Gibbs said, breaking into his thoughts.

"Come up to it! Get me a grappling hook, I'm going aboard."

…………

The ship smelled of old rum. There were empty bottles everywhere, some of them broken, so Teague had to watch his step. The flag that flew on the mast was tattered and old, but still bore the skull and crossbones that had been stolen from the Sparrow family crest. At the helm was Teague's brother, a bottle of rum in one hand, a pistol in the other. And it was pointed at Teague.

"Good evening, little bro," Teague said, walking up the steps to the helm.

"Evening, big bro," Grant replied, "come to shoot me again?"

"About that," Teague said, standing across from his brother, "You know I knew you were going to survive that.

"But it hurt," said Grant said, wincing in memory, "and now you will know."

As he said that, Grant Sparrow shot down his older brother.


	4. Chapter 4: Grant's Help

Disclaimer: I don't own any of this.

**Chapter 4**

It was pain like he had never imagined. The bullet tore through Teague's alcoholically-damaged liver, and came right out of his back. Teague stared at his brother in unreasonable shock as he fell down the stairs head first, and landed in a pile at the bottom.

"Now you know what it felt like," Grant continued, "Blood oozing out of my gut, pain like lightning through my body, and still not able to die or at least black out, to take away the pain. So, what did you want to talk about?"

But Teague had forgotten what he was going to talk about. "But I can die," He said instead, "I'll be mortal in two weeks. So will you. Surely you remember?"

"Of course I remember," Grant said, standing up, "So I take it you want me to take you and your ship to my island so that you can be immortal."

But Teague had blacked out. He was bleeding rather profusely, and was getting paler by the minute. Grant realized this, and decided to take Teague back to his ship. Jack was there to great them, and the look on his face as he saw his father resembled nothing a sane, sober human being had ever seen before.

"What did you do to me dad?" asked Jack, helping Grant take Teague into the lower levels of the ship, "He didn't insult your drapes again, did he?"

"Shut up."

"Shutting up," Jack said, for if there was anything in the world he feared, it was women, and relatives.

They got Teague situated with the ship doctor, who gave him a swig of water, and left him alone.

…………

Once Jack and Grant were able sit down, Grant took out a giant bottle of rum, which Jack snatched away from him immediately.

"So, Uncle Grant," he said, pouring himself a drink, "what do you want for your service in leading my ship to Scotch Island?"

"I won't navigate a ship under yer command, Jacky," said Grant, "You broke the code, and you know that there's only one thing to do to get forgiven for that."

"And what might that be?"

"I wouldn't send me own kin to that kind of servitude. The amount of service you have to do for a breach of the code like that, ye might as well just live the rest of yer life out."

Jack was about to ask more, but Teague woke up at that moment.

"Are we even now?" He asked his brother, grabbing the bottle from Jack.

"Yes," Grant said, taking his bottle back, "So why are you bringing Jacky here to Scotch Island?"

"He brought me on a quest for the fountain of youth."

"Oh he did, did he?" said Grant, looking over his nephew, "getting to be like his father and old Uncle Grant? Going off on mad quests for immortality? What's the last thing you did, try to steal Davy Jones's heart?" The insanity of the last thing he said prompted Grant to laugh hysterically.

"Well, er…actually yes."

"You bloody idiot!" Grant yelled, "What in the bloody hell do you thing you're doing, luring me onto a ship that's wanted by the _Flying Dutchman_?"

"I never said I was wanted by the _Dutchman_," Jack said, "because in case you haven't noticed, its dreaded captain is now the former captain."

"All of this is well and good," wheezed Teague, "But are you going to lead us to the island?"

"Aye," Grant said, "I'll be yer navigator."

"Good, then tell Mr. Gibbs what to do."

"Just go Northwest for three days."

"But," said Teague, "It was Northwest for three days the last time we went there."

"It always takes three days of having the guardian on your ship going Northwest to get to the island," Grant explained, "that's how the island makes sure that it only has one visitor at a time."

"The island makes sure?"

"Aye," Grant said, grinning, "the island."


	5. Chapter 5: The Island

Disclaimer: I don't own any of this.

**Chapter 5**

This news was somehow heard by the entire crew, which therefore had them all on edge by the third day. Teague was looking as pale as ever, having lost all of his blood, and still not dead. Jack was pretty pale, too, by now, but that was because of the lack of rum throughout the ship. Everyone on the ship was a bit impatient because of this same problem, and by noon on the third day, people started to see a giant pile of rum bottles off in the distance, but everyone thought that this was an illusion, so nobody told each other.

Unfortunately, this was not an illusion. In fact, it was the island. Grant and/or Teague would've told them this, but neither of them had good enough eyesight to see it. When they finally did see it, as it was big enough on the horizon for them to see, they told the crew that they were almost there.

At least, they would've been almost there, but there was a ship already there.

"That's impossible!" Grant said, when asked about this, "there is only one guardian of the island, and only a hip with the guardian of the island can find it, much less get past the coral reef that surrounds it!"

But the ship wasn't past the coral reef. It had its anchor down, and was turned to face the oncoming _Jack's Rum_. Jack just stared in disbelief at the ship, which seemed to have enough guns to destroy the_ Rum_ in ten minutes. The minute Jack realized this, he came to and started barking orders to turn around. But the ship put up colors of neutrality as soon as the _Rum_ started to turn around. At this, Jack was flabbergasted, so he decided to consult the only person who would have the answer- his father.

"What should we do?" Jack asked.

"See what they want," Teague said, "Remember, no ship can attack the Keeper of the Code."

"Aye," Jack said, "I hope they stick to the code."

So they sailed up to the mysterious ship, a black plank started to come out of the side of the ship. When the two vessels were lined up, two people from the other ship walked over the plank to the _Rum_. They were immediately taken to the bridge, where they would speak to Jack, the Captain. One of them identified himself as a Mr. David Gerrs, cousin to Captain Barbossa.

…………

This did not help Mr. Gerrs. As a matter of fact, Jack took to this news by promptly taking the one bottle of rum that his uncle had brought on board and smashing it over Gerrs's head. After doing this, however, he did turn to the other person and ask him what he (and his ship) was circling Scotch Island for. The person told him something very surprising.

"There's a war on," he said, "The seven of the nine pirate lords have declared war on each other. There was a massacre in which Captain Sumbjahee's flagship was destroyed by one of Captain Villanueva's."

"Where's Barbossa in all this?" Jack asked.

"He's trying to stop the conflict. He almost got the _Black Pearl_ destroyed in a battle with Villanueva's ship."

"That wasn't his ship to get destroyed," Jack said, "Mr. Gibbs!"

"Aye, captain?" said Mr. Gibbs, joining them.

"After we get to the island, tell the men that we are going to take back the _Pearl_."

"Aye, Captain."

…………

After the two strangers, one of them unconscious, got onto their ship, Jack, Teague, and the _Jack's Rum_ continued on to Scotch Island, with the navigation of Grant. The journey took about two hours, for they had to be very careful when navigating the reef. When they finally got there, the sight they saw was an impressive one.

The was a giant wall of empty Rum bottles, which surrounded a giant mountain with rivers that would flow down the side full of rum, brandy, and other alcoholic drinks. The smell was so strong that the men could smell it from the shore. Once they had dropped the anchor, an expedition including Jack, Teague, Grant, and Darryl went to a place where grant told them there was a door through the wall. When they got to the door, Grant took out a knife. He cut a drop of Teague's and then Jack's blood, mixed them in a cup of water he had with him, and drank it, fulfilling the requirement that two of his blood accompany him to the island the next time that he comes. He then opened the door, took a deep breath, and walked through. When nothing happened, Teague, Jack, and Darryl followed. Once through the door, the four of them saw a giant lake that smelled of alcohol. Jack handed Darryl his gun, sword, coat, and other affects, and jumped into the lake. Teague took a bottle of rum out of the wall that made the fortress, filled it, and handed it to Darryl, telling him to take it back to the crew and tell them to start loading the rum onto the ship.

Once this process got started, Jack had finished his swim and the original group that had come through the wall, minus Darryl, hiked up the mountain, to where Grant told them that there was a crater with the fountain of youth in it. The climb took them a few hours, but night did not seem to come to Scotch island.

They got to the crater, which was surrounded with a moat. There seemed to be something dangerous in the moat, for the water was disturbed, and there were dead bodies floating in it. There was a bridge across, but once they got to it they saw an animal often only found in fairy tales and fantasies: a Sphinx.


	6. Chapter 6: The Sphinx

Disclaimer: I don't own any of this

**Chapter 6**

It had a riddle for them, which they had to answer in order to pass.

"What three letters are at the beginning and end of life? The first letter is our beginning, the second a mother's, and the third a brother's. So where do we start, where do we end?" The Sphinx, which towered over the group, didn't seem to talk. Instead, the air seemed to vibrate with its words. The sound was so loud, in fact, that one of the men fell back down the mountain, his screams echoing into the abyss. They remaining crew were so shocked that they didn't realize for a full minute that they were supposed to answer. Everyone looked to Teague who seemed to be confident enough to answer.

But Jack came up with an answer first. "O M B!" he said, "We start in the womb, and end in the tomb." The tension could be felt in the air as everyone but Teague, who seemed to be preoccupied with a spot of dirt on his middle finger, stared at the Sphinx, wondering if it would be the last thing that they saw before they died.

"Yes," the Sphinx echoed, "enjoy immortality."

With that, the expedition from the _Jack's Rum _walked over the bridge, and to the lake where there was the fountain of youth. After they had all taken a long drink from the fountain, and Teague's wounds had healed, Teague went over to the Sphinx, who seemed to be summoning him.

"What is it, oh great Oracula?" Teague said, kneeling before the beast.

"You know my name?"

"I do."

"Not many mortals know my name," the Sphinx stated, "Most call me just Sphinx."

"I am one of the sons of Bartholomew," Teague explained, "your friend and savior."

"Of course," She said, "I didn't recognize you. Immortality has not been good to you."

"Unfortunately," Teague sighed, "but I can tell that that is not what you want to discuss."

"How very perceptive you are."

"Get to the point"

"You know what must happen. His kind cannot step foot on land after drinking the fountain's drink."

"Whose?"

"You know what he's done," Oracula said, "and because of that…"

"I understand," Teague interrupted, "I'll make sure that it is done. But what about this upcoming war?"

"Prophecies tell me that you must be involved, or there might not be a good outcome."

This was all that Teague needed to hear, so he moved back over to the rest of the group, and told them to pack up to go back down the mountain. Avoiding a look from Grant, who had overheard the conversation, Teague started back down the trail, waving a silent goodbye to the sphinx, and thinking about the events that were close in the future.


	7. Chapter 7: The Battle

Disclaimer: I don't own any of this

**Chapter 7**

One Month Later

_Jack, Teague, and crew have been sailing for a month, and are now tied up in a battle against a ship of the pirate lord Chevalle's, the _Gaul Guard

_Bam!_

_Plop._

_Bam!_

_Plop._

The sounds of the battle and the sounds of the rum room contrasted dramatically. Dramatically enough that Jack couldn't stand it. So, he went out on the deck to see his father directing the _Rum_'s part of the battle. For a guy who was one hundred and twenty-four, Teague didn't seem to have any qualms about getting deep into the battle. In fact, he had both his sword and his pistol brandished, and was fighting off the swarms of enemy pirates that were boarding the ship.

A sword from the corner of Jack's peripheral vision interrupted his thoughts, cutting off one of his dreads. Jack wasn't happy about this, but had no choice other than to roll to the side as the offending sword came sweeping back around.

"Nothing like a souvenir," the owner of the sword growled, a scarred and deformed pirate, "for killing a pirate lord"

"Hate to disappoint you" Jack tried to say, but was interrupted by another swing of the sword. Jack finally drew his own sword to defend himself, and flew into the air as a cannon blast hit nearby. Jack tumbled down and, thinking that he had lost the pirate, went back to his cabin and opened a bottle of rum. But the battle damaged pirate followed him, and jack barely had time to lift his sword before the pirate struck. Jack forced the pirate out of his cabin, and tried to chop his head off, but was thwarted with a kick down south. Jack bent over in pain, drew his pistol and, before his attacker could react, shot him in the face.

Locking his doors, Jack settled in his cabin, waiting out the rest of the battle.

Meanwhile, the battle was drawing to a close. Teague was on the enemy ship, and nearly all of its crew was dead. But Teague still had to find the captain. He stabbed a crewman who had his gun pointed at him, and finally found the captain's quarters. Inside was the captain, Pirate lord Capitaine Chevalle.

"Captain Teague" Chevalle whispered, already knowing his fate, "What is it 'ou want? My surrender?"

"You know what I want, Chevalle," Teague said, drawing his pistol, "hand it over"

"I do not 'ave it," Chevalle said, "The pieces of eight were destroyed when Calypso was freed."

"Don't try to fool me," Teague said, "I used to be the lord of Madagascar."

"I don't know what 'ou mean," Chevalle said, now backed up against the wall.

"At the third meeting of the Brethren Court, the pirate lords each claimed secondary pieces of eight."

"You want to be a lord again?"

"Yes," Teague said, "now give me your sword."

"No"

But Teague shot the now former pirate lord.

The rest of the battle went by quickly. Teague dragged Chevalle's body out to the deck to show his crew that he was dead, and the French crew surrendered, giving Teague all of their ammunition, and taking his flag to fly under Teague's colors.

And the _Rum_ was ready to set sail again. Jack was happy, because that meant that they were that much closer to land, and that much closer to rum. Jack also needed to know what the situation was with the war.

The War. Jack could hardly believe that the pirates, who had just recently united to fight off the East India Company, were already fighting each other. He could tell that this war might be the last of them. This was a grave thought, but then he realized that if all the other pirates were wiped out, then he could keep all the rum.


End file.
